Sunday, May 17, 2015

Wedding Traditions: To Toss or Not to Toss?



This week we will talk about wedding traditions,
 Which ones you can pass and what twists you can give them.

Traditions can be great, but not all wedding traditions are
Necessary, or even meaningful, in today’s weddings.
The thing that is important in a tradition is that it means
Something to you. So don’t do the traditional wedding
Vows if they hold no personal meaning for you…
Here are some old traditions that no one miss,
And a couple that I think are outdated and awkward.










Giving Favors:*
Can you remember any of the wedding favors you’ve
Received at a wedding?
I bet most of you will say no.While favors can be a fun
Way to include your personalities or identities into your wedding details,
They aren’t necessary and probably won’t be missed.




Having your dad walk you down the aisle.
While some brides (and dads!) love this tradition and look forward to it,
Many brides are uncomfortable with the patriarchal roots of this tradition
Or just don't have great relationships with their fathers. So if you want 
To walk with both of your parents, your mom, your stepdad, or just walk 
Alone, it's really just a personal choice.



* Other traditions have died because of changing social norms,
Like tying the bride’s shoes to the bumper of the newlyweds’ car.
The bride’s shoes were seen as a symbol of possession or
Ownership, and her father would take her shoes before the wedding
And give them to the groom – basically transferring ownership
Of the bride to the groom.  This obviously wouldn’t go over very
Well today, and it effectively ended in the 1960’s and 1970’s when
Gender equality rightfully became a big issue.


* As for the garter, the decline seems to be more of an issue of
Decorum than of political correctness.  A groom once said, 
“There’s no ‘classy’ way to stick my hands up her (the bride’s) 
Dress in front of her grandma.”  I think that was pretty well put.
At many modern weddings, the groom removes and tosses the 
Bride’s garter to the groomsmen right after the bride tosses her 
Bouquet to the bridesmaids. Traditionally, the unmarried man who 
Catches the garter must place it on the leg of the unmarried woman 
Who catches the bouquet, and it is said that they will be the next two
To marry (not necessarily to each other). It’s a fun ritual, but many
Couples have chosen not to include it because guests could be injured
Easily, and it might embarrass the single women who are 
“dragged” to the floor to participate.


 * Having a Bride’s Side and a Groom’s Side:
While the idea of having your friends and family on your 
“Side” doesn’t bother me. I also love the idea of letting people 
Sit wherever they want for your ceremony.  And it eliminates the
Need for ushers, which I also think are totally unnecessary.



Here are some alternatives to the 
Bouquet/garter toss:
*Throw the Bouquet to All Women – Most of the bouquet tosses
That I see now include both unmarried and married women, 
Without the garter toss.  Tossing it to all of the Women eliminates the 
“Stigma” issue, and still allows you to include the tradition at your 
Wedding. 
*Invite all the women onto the dance floor, married and single. 
Ask them all to make a wish right as the bouquet is tossed and whoever 
Catches it will get their wish.
*The couple say a few words and then ‘as a token of love and 
Appreciation', They give the bouquet to her parents.
*Whichever version the couple chose, the bouquet and garter toss are best 
Done right after the cake cutting. This allows the caterer to cut and serve 
The Cake while guests are being entertained. Many couples are 
Dispensing with These two traditions altogether,
While some hold fast to what they have
Known, like and wish to replicate.



The decision to do a bouquet toss or garter toss is definitely a matter 
Of personal preference, sensibilities and sensitivities of the couple 
And their guests. Each couple should weigh their options before deciding.

Hope I helped :)

What have you decided? 
Would you pass the bouquet or garter toss? The
What about tying the bride's shoes to the car?
See you on the next post,
Love,
 .Talila



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