This week We will talk about the best man .
How to Choose a Best man?
What his role at the wedding?
Stay with me, it's going to be interesting…
Best Man’s Duties Checklist:
Being asked to be the best man in a wedding is a great honor. We don’t get bestowed with the title “best” very often in our lives. It shows that your friend or family member holds your relationship in great esteem. You’ve been his go-to guy in life; now he needs you to be his point person during this weighty rite-of-passage. So don’t just shuffle through your role; instead, help your buddy through the most important day of his life by stepping up and fulfilling your duties with competence.
Just what are those duties?
Here’s a rundown of your responsibilities as the best man:
Before the Wedding
Plan the bachelor party. This is one of your biggest responsibilities. Luckily, we’ve written up a handy guide on just how to do it.
Get fitted for a tux/suit. In former times, etiquette dictated that the groom pay for rental or purchase of the tuxes for his groomsmen. These days, the groom often expects you to pony up the dough yourself. Personally, I find it in poor taste to ask someone to be in your wedding and then expect them to pay for their own tux, but it’s become a common practice.
Whether you’re buying or renting, paying or not, you will likely be expected to get fitted for your tux or suit. You’re responsible for showing up to the appointment and making sure the other groomsmen do as well.
Go to the rehearsal.
The day before the wedding, there will be a rehearsal held where the actual wedding will take place. It can’t start without you, so be sure to arrive on time. It should only last for a half an hour or so.
Go to the rehearsal dinner. After the rehearsal, those in the wedding party (and other family and friends the couple may have invited) will head over to the rehearsal dinner, typically held at a restaurant. There is usually toasting at the dinner, and while you are welcome to make a toast, I recommend holding off until your big speech at the wedding reception. You don’t want to use up your best material.
The Day of the Wedding
A wedding day is a whirlwind of activity. Your job as the best man is to take the burden of stress off the groom and onto your shoulders. You’ll be his go-to guy: his support, assistant, and valet. You make sure things are in place, that the groom has what he needs, gets to where he needs to be, and stays relaxed. If you do your job right, the groom will only need to worry about walking down that aisle.
Before the Ceremony
Hang out with the groom as he dresses for the ceremony. Keep your friend calm and relaxed (although not with spirits). There may be some downtime before the ceremony, so play some video games and just chill. Skip questions like, “Dude, are you sure you want to do this?” and instead offer calming encouragement.
Make sure the groom has whatever he needs.
Not just for the wedding but for the honeymoon as well. He may not be coming back to his house/hotel/apartment before heading off into the sunset with his bride. So make sure he has the marriage license, that he’s all packed, and that the luggage, tickets, passport, etc. get put in the car.
Drive the groom over to the wedding location. Get there at least 30 minutes before the ceremony starts.
Distribute the boutonnieres and make sure the groomsmen are wearing them properly. They should be placed in the buttonhole of the left lapel of one’s suit jacket. If there’s no buttonhole, then pin them there.
Enter with the groom.
The order of the wedding processional varies by the type of wedding and the couple’s faith tradition, but most frequently the minister or priest, best man, and groom (in that order) come into the church through a side door at the front.
Hold onto the groom’s ring. It’s your job to keep the ring safe and sound in your pocket and to fish it out at the appropriate time during the ceremony.
Escort the maid/matron of honor out of the church at the conclusion of the ceremony.
Sign the marriage license. After the wedding, you may be asked to be a witness and sign the marriage license.
At the Reception
Dance with the matron/maid of honor and the bridesmaids.
Kick off the toasting with the best man speech. This is the job that probably first comes to mind when you think about being the best man. And it’s probably the job you’re most nervous about. But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered with a foolproof plan to knock your speech out of the park.
An interesting side note: The best man used to also read telegrams from well-wishers who couldn’t make it to the ceremony. Sounds like a nice tradition from bygone days.
Decorate the getaway car.
During the reception, sneak out with your groomsmen and decorate the bride and groom’s getaway mobile. Make it kitschy, a little embarrassing, but no tuber. And of course, don’t get too carried away and damage the car. Use your judgment in how far to take it by how good of sports the bride and groom are.
Tying some cans with string to the underside of the car is classic,
As is writing on the windows with windows paint. Stick
Some balloons on the outside and stuff them in the interior. Tape some ribbons to the hubcaps. Stick on some window clings. They make specific ones, but I would go with something truly random .
If they’re renting a limo or a slick set of wheels, you’ll probably have to skip this step.
After the wedding, bring the groom’s tux to the cleaners or back to the rental shop. Take care of this while he’s on the honeymoon.
Great Tips for Writing your Best Man Speech
1. Remember to introduce yourself to everyone somewhere near the beginning of the speech – your name and your relationship to the groom/couple.
- Try not to make it too in-jokey, anecdotes are great, but leave out the phrases and odd songs that are probably hilarious to you and the lads, but that most people won't get.
- Compliment the bride on how she looks, how great the day has gone so far, and how everyone appreciates all the work she’s done to create such a special day. Also mention about the bridesmaids looking lovely/scrubbing up well.
- Don't write a speech about your pub escapades with the groom, by all means tell some funny anecdotes (remember his parents will be there!) but remember that the speech should be centered on the couple and the day.
- Mention the parents, and what a good job they did getting the bride/groom to where they are now, whether the parents are there or not.
- Keep it clean – It's not a roast, so the less swearing and 'toilet' jokes the better really, think of the younger and older guests, and don’t embarrass your hosts by embarrassing their guests. Again we'll say stay completely away from ex partners of either the bride or groom, nothing good can come of it.
- If something went wrong on the morning/at the ceremony, allude to it, but don’t make too much of a big deal out of it.
- Be sincere, speak about the great times you’ve had with the groom, the couple and/or their family and wish them everything for the future.
- Keep it light – Although you want to be genuine and sincere, one or two more serious sentiments can be spoke about, but mainly leave it to the groom/father. Think of yourself as the fun and slightly corny entertainment beforehand.
- Dodgy one-liners are okay to use, but keep them to a minimum.
- Don't forget to toast the couple at the end!
Gift Ideas for Your Best Man and Groomsmen:
Tickets to Their Favorite Event or Show
Giving event tickets as a best man gift is unconventional. That is precisely the reason why it increasingly sounds appealing to so many people. Since you’ve picked him as your best man, you should know his favorite sports team. If you don’t, go do some homework and it is the best way to show your sincerity. Tickets to sports events, especially those of major teams, are usually expensive. Chances are high that your best man has always loved to go watch his favorite team perform, but rarely does so. One reason could be the high ticket price. This presents you with the perfect opening and this tops my list of gifts for the groomsman.
Deep within every one of us (especially guys), there is this insatiable desire for gadgets. This is probably the reason why such gadget shows as CES is still doing so well these days. Anything technology related always makes great best man gift in today’s world. With the speed of today’s technology there is always a new gadget out. Often if you jump on the new items out there, you can be the first to get what will in the months and years to come be something we can’t live without. After all less than 12 years ago was the birth of the tablet
If your best man is a sports maniac, anything related to his favorite sports team is sure to be a hit. While you may not be able to find something that he doesn’t already have, you may be able to find something he didn’t know existed. Finding that obscure thing that he missed can be fun. It can be a good source for ribbing him later.
Personalized Gifts with Engravings
Do you and your best man have an inside joke that you share? Most grooms and their best men have a wide range of stories they could share. Instead of the standard of engraving you and your fiancés name along with the wedding date why not engrave something that alludes to one of your infamous trysts? This makes wonderful best man
gifts for sure.
:Other Unique Gift Ideas
Wrist Watch - Dressy or casual with an engraving on the back of it.
Pocket Watch - If you prefer something more unique, a pocket watch to be brought out on occasion is a nice idea. Engraving could be put on the back.
Engraved Stainless Steel Swiss Army Knife or Pocket Knife - These items can always come in handy and can be easily engraved.
Have you been the best man in a wedding?
What advice would you give other best men on how to fulfill this role? Share your advice with us in the comments.
See you on the next post,